Where's Doddy?

by Mick Spreader 31. March 2009 07:25

Rob "Family Man" Wilson seems to have been particularly busy recently. Must make organising Christmas lunch tricky, no wonder he needs a three bird roast, fnarr fnarr! [Who let Finbar Saunders in? Ed]

But we digress. What is a photocall in Reading without our favourite visiting attic dweller? See if you can spot her!

 

 

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Conservative | Labour

Get Stuffed!

by Mick Spreader 24. December 2008 05:30
Workhouse
Tory Welfare Reforms unveiled

Rob Wilson MP demonstrated his common touch in the run up to Christmas Day by popping into his local butchers to pick up his festive fayre. He told the waiting press photographer: "I think everyone should pay a visit to their local victuallers and stock up on pheasant, duck, goose and quail this festive season. Christmas just wouldn't be Christmas without the traditional three-bird-roast that no-one has eaten in living memory but that my good chum Antony Worral-Tory told us is the must have meal this Christmas. At 500 calories a portion it is just as nutrious as a McDonalds. I've just had a great idea to abolish means tested benefits which I've passed onto my chum Cameron. There's a simpler way of weeding out work shy slackers without all that form filling and beaurocracy. If you have to buy a frozen turkey from Tesco then it's back to the workhouse for you. Hoorah! Toodle Pip!"

Martin Salter has hit out at the elitist ramblings from the Tories. He told us: "Bah Humbug! Sending the poor back to workhouses is our idea. But if a three bird roast is good enough for Jordan and Peter Andre, then it's good enough for my constituents. So if anyone in Coley Park fancies a bit of pheasant on Christmas Day, just give me a call and I'll bang a few for you."

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Conservative | Labour

Lab Mag

by Mick Spreader 15. December 2008 04:48
Live Reading Magazine

Rob Wilson has stepped into the row over Reading Borough Council's LIVE Reading magazine. The council rag which managed 17 mentions of Labour councillors in the run up to last year's local elections will cost £56,020 in the coming year – a rise of more than 30 per cent, mainly due to a fall in advertising revenue from the local Labour Party.

Rob Wilson complained: "This is why I believe the council should take a metaphorical leaf out of Boris’ book by scrapping the mag and replacing it with a tree planting programme across the borough, and maybe shagging a few journalists for good measure whilst we're at it. Go Boris!"

A council spokesperson defended the magazine. "This is a much more cost effective way to communicate with residents than producing a raft of separate leaflets containing former leader David Sutton's telephone number instead of the elected councillor's."

Meanwhile tax payers have hit back at the Reading East MP by asking Rob Wilson to save thousands more trees by scrapping his "Parliamentary Reports" sent to every home in the constituency in increasing frequency near elections paid for out of the snouts in the trough Parliamentary allowances.

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Conservative | Labour | RBC

Junk Male

by Mick Spreader 19. November 2008 01:29
Tory Leaflets

Rob Wilson has expressed concern at his party's line on getting tough on immigrants after junk mail delivery workers failed to make it to Tier Two of the points-based immigration system.

He wailed: "How the hell will I be able to get out my piss-poor tax payer funded 'Parliamentary Report' if there aren't enough Iraqi refugees to pound the streets of Reading delivering it?"

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Conservative

On The House

by Mick Spreader 8. October 2008 09:38
Rob Wilson
Steals from the Poor
...to Give to the Poor.

Local Conservatives have hit out at Government policies which they say have reduced the numbers of council houses sold to tenants under right-to-buy schemes. In a press release, regurgitated uncritically, Rob Wilson and Alok Sharma have highlighted the reduction in discounts given over the last ten years to tenants.

Rob Wilson told us: "In 1998, £22,800 was 50% of the house price. Now the current figure of £25,340 is only 24% of the house price. Conservatives say that councils should be forced to make up the difference and hand out an extra £30,000 of your money to all council tenants who want to buy their houses. It's unfair that council tenants should be denied the democratic right to live in negative equity paid for out of everyone else's council tax." Alok Sharma said: "Vote Conservative, if you want more state handouts to the few."

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Conservative

A-Salter Battery

by Mick Spreader 22. March 2007 18:00
Martin Salter

Martin Salter has denied wasting hundreds of pounds of council tax payers money by asking for a breakdown of the costs of changing the name of Reading to 'Reading-on-Thames', despite it being an obvious throw-away-remark by Reading East MP Rob Wilson.

"This accusation is cobblers," he said. "Reading Council already does my bidding so why would this small expenditure make a difference? We all know I own this town. Who's the Daddy? Come on, Who's the Daddy?

"Obviously if we'd got 'City' status changing our name to Reading City Council would have been money well spent... because I thought of it."

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