Local MP Martin Salter's has justified his support of a criminal justice bill to outlaw something that is already illegal by quoting an urban legend about snuff movies in the House of Commons. Mr. Salter in fact went further and proposed that all computers be fitted with a government controlled device to snoop on people using computers who access the internet.

He told the Commons: "If you have nothing to hide you have nothing to fear... unless it's my own correspondance. In any case it doesn't matter that my support of legislation to remove other people's freedoms is based on scientifically incorrect or flimsy hear-say evidence that I dig up because it gets my name in the papers. Think of the children, won't somebody think of the children?"

Mr. Salter carried on outlining to MPs other areas that he wanted to see action on based on an afternoon's surfing in the Commons' internet café: "I've read today on the interweb that kidney theft is rife with victims waking up in ice filled baths. I've also received an email from the Reverend Odubi Darlington Tokunbo for my assistance and although he is not one of my constituents I ask that the government act quickly to help the plight of Nigerian widows. His proposals look a good deal for all concerned."