It has been claimed that red haired Reading politicians have been forced to move after being threatened by local thugs. Thames Valley Police said there had been a number of incidents of all of which had been fully investigated, but each time there was not enough evidence to bring charges. However, we can reveal that June Orton was forced out of Abbey ward by local gangs of taxi drivers and one publicity shy victim was forced to move to Strasbourg after years of torment. Police are now said to be mounting a 24 hour patrol around Anneliese Dodds' home after notes were posted through her letter box saying: "You must dye before you will get elected in Reading".

A Reading Labour Party spokeman hit back at the accusations: "We vehemently deny targeting these people because of the colour of their hair. Absolutely ridiculous, we wouldn't target them because of that, it's because they're women."