A state-of-the-art monorail has been proposed to ease congestion and improve access to Heathrow airport from Reading. Lyle Lanley of the Thames Valley Economic Partnership set out the case in a presentation by TVEP to business leaders and Government ministers at the House of Commons. Mr. Lanley told them: "Well, there's nothing on earth like a genuine, bona fide, electrified, six-car monorail!"

Questions were put to Mr. Langley on behalf of local people. Friends of the Earth were worried by the environmental damage and asked: I hear those things are awfully loud..." "It glides as softly as a cloud." Reading Taxi Association was also worried: "Would spell the taxis' end?" "Not on your life, my muslim friend." The impact on unemployment was also brought up: "What about us brain-dead slobs?" "You'll be given cushy jobs." While the Bishop of Reading spoke for all when he asked: "Were you sent here by the devil?", "No, good sir, I'm on the level."

However, one resident told us: "I'm worried that if First Great Western get the franchise, our bags might not even turn up at Terminal 5 in time to be lost."