Swaine flu has been confirmed in Reading and residents are asked to be vigilant.
Symptoms
- Loss of your seat on the council
- Making rash promises
- Feverish campaigning after infection
Swaine flu is a disease thought to be caused by eating too much bacon. You can help prevent a pandemic, by grilling instead of frying.
Treatment
If you are in a vulnerable group you may experience a self-righteous little prick.
How does Swaine Flu spread?
If you let one of the little bastards take a seat in your ward, you are likely to become completely infected.
Do I Need A Face Mask?
Only on election leaflets to avoid scaring young children.