Caversham Conservatives have seized power in Reading after announcing a Unilateral Declaration of Independence. From their powerbase on the Caversham heights, Richard Willis has taken charge of a white minority council cabinet. He denied that with only 13% of the eligible electorate bothering to vote for the Tories that his actions were undemocratic: "It is far more democratic than most other towns under Tory control."

Squadron Leader Willis sees his job now as primarily being paternal. He told the Press Association: "You can't expect the natives to be able to rule themselves. They've been electing Labour councils for goodness sake! With this new period of benign rule from the Reading elite I expect Reading to be an economic success story. As you can see by the election of Wazir Hussain in Park, black people are flocking in to Reading from Wokingham, even now my good friend Uncle Tom has told me that he will be joining us next week."

Rob Wilson refused to comment on his Aide-de-Camp's actions, but he was heard to mutter: "Oh, bollocks, there goes the black vote, still they weren't likely to vote for me anyway."